why?

we've already made a deal that no more complaints, no more concerns
well, how careworn was I
every singal day told the tiny jane living in my inner life to be a happy person, at least do not be a people sick with herself

choose to wait until the one shows up
choose to smile even the tears welled out
choose to laugh though the sarrow occupied bosom
choose to choose nothing```

these day the toefl test tortures me so much as driving me crazy.
aiming at perfection in everything and no allowrance for my excuses
if I cannot lighten this load, I would never get rid of the ravelment all my life

why? why I had to endure this?

sleep at 3:00am and get up at 8:00am
how pathetic how radiculous how void I was
wasting so much on meaninglss business
worn , toilsome, but how much did I do on the well-timed thing
why make yourself look awful
technically, you just suffer from your own action